Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Had to Happen

Evan came over this morning and I told him Katie found her birth mother. We hadn't said anything to him. I guess I just wanted to put it off as long as possible. We've never heard from his birth mother at all and based on the letters she sent with him when he came to us, the story is not likely to be as positive. She did not tell his father of the pregnancy.

His first words: "How? I've always wanted to find my real mother."

It felt like he slapped me, even though I know that's not how he meant it. I held myself together long enough to put a package together like the one I made for Katie. All he has to do now is write a letter to her and drop it in.

However you pray, please join me in praying for my son. He acts tough, but he is so fragile. All I ask is that God be gentle with him.

7 comments:

Doubting Thomas said...

You're right; It had to happen at some point. An act of courage to tell him now, rather than wait for it to leak in some other fashion.

My thoughts are with him. And with you.

As parents, we all eventually reach a point where we have to acknowledge that our kids have their own stories. Though ours are connected to theirs, it's a mistake to think that we dictate those stories, or are even primarily responsible for them.

It's of course natural to feel incredible empathy for our children, but we do no one any good by trying to own their stories for them.

If I ever get good at that philosophy, I'll let you know.

Go Mama said...

everything is unfolding right now...
in perfect and divine order...

you are surrounded in love...

surrounded...

mamatulip said...

I am so glad that he has you. And you, he.

Lots of love to the both of you.

luckyzmom said...

I agree with doubting thomas (almost always) and my heart goes out to you and your son.

Michelle O'Neil said...

Love.

Carrie Wilson Link said...

Gentleness all around.

kario said...

Lighting a candle for both of you as soon as I'm done here....

Love.