Thoughts of this post woke me this morning, but I didn't want to write it. Didn't want to admit to wasting my time on such trash.
Last night I found myself being sucked into the Ben Afleck movie, "Paycheck," even though it's the kind of thing I normally avoid at all costs. (I plead insanity due to exhaustion.) The premise involves the downside of being able to see the future. Can't shake thoughts of that, even this morning.
My closest friends can tell you how often I obsess about wanting to know something--anything--for sure. Ad naseum.Thing is, looking back I know I wouldn't have believed much of my life story if someone HAD told me ahead of time. And, in my ignorance, I would have tried to avoid some painful events that turned out to be my greatest blessings. Yet, I'd still give a lot to know what's heading toward me.
I am trying to love the questions themselves, a la Rilke, but that's hard. Damn hard.