Monday, January 03, 2011

The Line of Demarcation

At what point does "I haven't shaved my legs" become "I don't shave my legs"? I glanced down at mine this morning and for just a moment thought a hobbit had borrowed my nightgown.

In one or the other of her recent books -- I've read both and don't remember which. Like Nora, I feel bad about my neck, and I remember nothing, which makes things confusing -- Nora Ephron talks about spending eight hours a week on "maintenance." I don't think she's talking about sinks, but that's the only maintenance I've done lately.

We don't need to go into the gory details of my decision to replace the kitchen faucet and garbage disposal the day before hosting my entire extended family for Christmas dinner. It's enough to tell you I could have shaved my legs, arms, face and head in the time I struggled with that mess. I could have had a manicure, a pedicure and maybe even cured a minor disease or two. I could have had my hair highlighted, if only I still highlighted my hair. Lord, I could have had a facial. I remember facials. Dimly.

Instead, I have a permanent crick in my neck from lying under the sink for hours, trying to connect faulty connections. But eventually, I had a faucet that doesn't drip and a garbage disposal that reliably disposes.

And very, very hairy legs.

Note: the photo is Mo'nique, not me. My toenails don't look that good.


Deb Shucka said...

Laughing out loud here, and really grateful to know I'm not the only one whose razor sits rusting in her shower. The good news is that as we get older, it's harder to see the hair, so who cares, right? I have to say I still draw the line at chin hairs. Those puppies get yanked the minute they show up.

Amber said...

I thought those were man legs, I gotta tell you. lol!

This is not so bad. In my little-hippie-kid days, I remember the friend of my dads (cough cough), who had hairy legs, pits AND at least three inch black hairs growing between her boobs. Which were, obviously, bare for all to see. Because that is the visual I needed to have burned into my brain for life. haha!

luckyzmom said...

There is often a fine line where choosing priorities is concerned{:-D

kario said...

It's winter! You need that hair to keep your legs warm! That's my story, anyway, and I'm sticking to it!

Anonymous said...

My girls tell me it's called:
"No-shave November"
"Don't-do December"
"Just-say-no! January"
"Forget February"
"Mustn't-in March"
"Almost-thinkin'-about-it April"

Where DO they get those brains?!


Anonymous said...

I wish we never had to shave. Of course we never do have to, but I wish we never felt like we had to . I wish it was never decided that hairy ain't beautiful. I wish the first woman told that hadn't believed it.



Nancy said...

Oh how you make me laugh and wow how I can relate!