Thursday, November 15, 2007

Have You Ever Noticed...

when it really bugs you, a little bit of something feels like a whole lot of that thing?

I've been writing like crazy the last few days and have neglected my hair removal responsibilities. In return, my neck and chin have sprouted 7 (yes, I counted) stiff hairs that MAKE ME CRAZY, make me feel like I have a full beard, make me want to buy stock in Gilette.

I find myself stroking my neck when I stop to think, a little like I imagine Rasputin may have done. And every single time, I am shocked and disgusted with myself for allowing something so ugly to grow on my face.

Why didn't I tweeze them instead of taking time to write about how awful they are? Can't. Find. The. Damn. Tweezers.

Stuck. In. Whisker. Hell.

Mom says dogs have stiff whiskers that they use to understand the world.

If only.


Mystic Wing said...

Ummm, I'm quite sure we're never going to mistake you for the bearded lady.

Yup, I do think your glasses are tinted a shade other than rose at the moment.

For those of you who have never met Jerri in person....

Not exactly a hideous beast, if you get my drift.

riversgrace said...

Just think of all those old, wise medicine women. They didn't pluck!

Spin your stories, mix your brew. That other stuff doesn't matter (for now).

Michelle O'Neil said...

Everyone's got something. Jenny has a gray hair, Carrie has a gray hair down there, even the beautiful Jenny McCarthy has "ring around the asshole" (p. 125 of Life Laughs).

I'm not going to tell you mine, but eveyone has something. Believe it.

Deb said...

You could comfort yourself with the anticipation of how much fun it will be to pluck them when you finally solve the mystery of the missing tweezers. Have yours turned white yet? It's like having a toilet brush on your chin.

Jerri said...

No, Deb. The hair on my head is white. The hair on my chins is black. The better to see them with, my dear.

kario said...

And you thought you didn't have any cute stories! Shah!

Love you and your chin hairs. Each and every one of them.

Carrie Wilson Link said...

OK, see? You DO have funny stories! And thanks, Deb, for the toilet bowl brush image! Gross!

And, BTW, I do not have a grey hair down there! I. Found. My. Tweezers.

Amber said...

I have three of these hairs. Two of them grow out of the mole on my jaw.
Sexy, no?



Suzy said...

What the hell kind of chat room is this??????

I'M IN!!!!!!

kario said...

I remember a great aunt of mine when I was a kid who had a ginormous mole on her chin with coarse black hairs growing out of it. Instead of being afraid of it, I was proud to have a witch in my family. I mean, who else could sport a 'spider' on her chin as a pet?

Stacy said...

Tweezerman rocks!
I tweeze them while driving, saves time.