Saturday, June 16, 2007

Fearlessness and Right Action

Had the strangest dreams last night, including this odd little bit.

I was traveling, visiting someplace in the US, an urban area near wild and beautiful settings. My folks were with me and we had rented an apartment-like place to stay while we were at this festival. I had been enjoying the events and spending time with many of the locals. At an event late at night, I reached for my purse to pay for a glass of wine I'd had with a couple I'd gotten to know and like. It turned out I'd left my purse at the apt., so I ran back to get it. Running back, I felt strong and healthy and as though running were no challenge at all. My dream self observed how strong and capable she felt and knew that she'd found her stride. I felt what it would be like to be a real runner, just the movement, not the drudgery and effort.

I was surprised to find the couple still there when I got back. After I'd paid for the wine, they began to explain to me that they were planning to sue me. They showed me pictures of watches the woman designed and told me I looked like I had money. They'd seen me wear jewelry too close to her designs and they were going to sue me for it.

I stood up, told them they could certainly try, but they'd have hell to pay making it stick. I walked off without a backward glance. The guy caught up to me and told me they would back down. He said his wife thought I was a soft touch but he warned her against trying. When he walked away, I could hear him talking to her: "She's not who you thought. For one thing, look at her. She doesn't weigh any XXX pounds (my actual weight). She's much smaller and stronger than you thought. Forget it. This isn't going to work."

I ran back to the apt. and started to go in the back way so I wouldn't wake my folks. As I went down the stairs to the basement, a man followed me. I turned and told him to get away from me. He shrugged and continued to follow me down the stairs. "There's nothing down here for you," I said, and I walked toward him, which made him back up the stairs and then turn and run away.

Another man appeared, This one older and not so large, but drunk. He, too, felt threatening. He walked toward the stairs, boasting about how he would take me where he wanted me. I waited until he got near the stair rail, then pushed him and watched as he toppled over the rail and down the stairs.

The next morning other people in the apt. building were looking out their doors, chatting with my mother about what had happened. My mom was about to defend my actions when the other women broke in to tell her they'd heard and seen nothing, but whatever happened was good and right because no man had a right to threaten a woman and no one who didn't live there should be trying to get into the basement so late at night.

I woke, feeling strong and confident. And thin.

The thin feeling didn't last long, but I think Green Tara's fearlessness and compassion are working on me through my dreams.

If you guys have ideas of the meaning, I'd sure be interested.

7 comments:

Amber said...

WOW!! What an ENPOWERING dream. How great that your spirit is telling you how stong and wonderfully perfect just the way you are. And how fun to read it. Yeah!

:)

kario said...

You go, girl! I'm definitely not messing with you. Glad to hear your subconscious is so sure about your fearlessness - she's right, you know. ;-)

Love.

Anonymous said...

This was some dream! I think you need to believe what your dream was trying to tell you that you are a strong, powerful compassionate woman who has a lot of courage. Your not taking any crap from anyone, you know who you are and where you want to go....follow that path. I would not like to be the one trying to stop you...(just kidding) Sending love and lots of blessings.

Alijah Fitt said...

Hi, I just got here (no weekend blogging)


"The next morning other people in the apt. building were looking out their doors, chatting with my mother about what had happened."- My mother symbolizes my maternal instincts towards myself here, compartmentalized pieces of my psyche, battling to hold me up or bring me down.


"My mom was about to defend my actions when the other women broke in to tell her they'd heard and seen nothing, but whatever happened was good and right because no man had a right to threaten a woman and no one who didn't live there should be trying to get into the basement so late at night."- I am in complete control of my psyche and my actions, I am powerful and kick the dark ones who threaten me out of my sub-conscious.(basement-sub-c.)

I am working on the thin thing too, tough one!

Anonymous said...

Powerful, Jerri. Wow. I'm so glad you wrote this one down. I really hope you will remember the feeling you had upon awakening. I like the interpretations above. xo t

Carrie Wilson Link said...

Replay the dream to yourself, and after each phrase say, "part of me". Jung says we are all aspects of our dreams, and this activity helps us to see how.

Powerful dream for SURE!

Alijah Fitt said...

I dont mean to be a know it all here, but Carrie has the right formula for the nouns. For the verbs you say, "I have myself". and the dream tells a more personal story. You can take it further from there too but that's another post I guess.